I couldn't stop the tears. While I sat on Shawn's couch waiting for him to get ready for work I fought back the tears. Once he was dressed, I said I had to go. I couldn't prolong this exit. A light peck on the lips, a thank you for coming, a call me, and I was out the door. I then cried all the way back to the hotel. I feel so strongly that Shawn is the man I'm supposed to be with. I don't think he feels the same way. He's very reserved with his emotions, stunted even. I'm about to leave Oklahoma, probably for the last time. There is so much to say but I will formulate how I want to say it as I drive towards Kansas this morning. I've experienced so many emotions in the last 4 days that I can't begin to express them right this minute. When I arrive at a hotel this evening, I will begin to explore my feelings and record them. I'll close with just this: Coulda, Shoulda, Woulda!